Let us pretend you’ve been ‘Taken’ into the middle of Kathmandu, and to survive you must pick from one of 5 occupations: Hindu priest, street beggar, mugger, shoemaker, or potential spouse.
August 21
The town of Pashupatinath contains a Hindu temple to the deity Shiva. Inside the temple grounds, a couple Hindu priests heckle me, repeatedly asking me if I want a ‘special pooja.’ Inside a shrine, a priest performs a ritual to bless my family and subsequently informs me that I must cough up a large monetary offering.
~ August 24
My friend and I are hurrying to class at the Ka-Nying Shedrub Ling monastery and we don’t have time to eat the second large banana pancake she accidentally ordered, so I ask the waiter for a plastic bag and stuff the warm pancake inside the black bag. We know of a couple street beggars that are always begging to make eye contact with Westerners.
~ September 04
My friend Stefan explains to me how some professional muggers operate in Kathmandu. They will see me walking alone at night on a deserted, poorly lighted street. A man will show up right in front of me, and within that moment of surprise, another will come up from behind and tightly wrap something around my neck/head (with a specific technique, placement, or scent) and I will lose consciousness. When I wake up soon after, I will find that all my money has disappeared.
~ September 06
I find some shoemakers sitting on the side of a street leading to the Boudha Stupa. One of them takes my ripped shoe and tells me that I can pay him whatever I want. After the shoe is fixed, I offer money but he won’t accept it. He wants me follow him into a store a little ways away, which he has obviously pre-designated, and then buy food for his family.
~ September 06
Walking alone on Boudha Main Road, I look around through the dust and crowd for a friend. Suddenly, a Nepali man asks me if I am looking for something, in a suspicious manner. I tell him I’m fine and walk on. A nearby Nepali woman holding a baby smiles a big smile and asks me, “Where are you from?” I tell her I’m busy and I keep walking. The man from earlier tails me for a minute or two and then begins to walk beside me, at which point he informs me, “That woman is looking for a husband.” I respond with, “No, thanks.”
Choices A-Plenty
It feels as if I am the protagonist in each little story, weaving through strange forces. It is stranger still, how during the actual events, I felt that their goal was centered on me. Could it be that I have mistaken the object of their actions? If I mistook the object as myself, instead of what it actually is, maybe they committed a similar error.
Immersion into another culture can lead to questioning the validity of cultural values. The value system in Nepal is simply not the same as it is in the U.S.
On Wednesday night, Tashi, the father in my host family, dropped a friend of mine off at her guesthouse on his motorcycle, the vehicle of choice in Nepal. He later said to me, “Stephanie asked me if I wanted to meet your other friend (Lauren) and I said no” (according to Stephanie, he just asked, “Who’s Lauren?” and left without addressing the request). It was innocently assumed that he was just in a hurry to get home even though he did not give her an excuse or a reason for ignoring the request. An American who did not want to meet someone might have tried to immediately dissipate any awkwardness, but Tashi was indifferent.
He continued explaining to me, “I have no negativity about it. It is just not important. People around here do not talk to others with whom they have no business.” His wife Pema affirmed his comments. When asked to clarify, she used a metaphor to emphasize the apathy: “It’s like being asked, ‘Do you want water,’ and answering, ‘No, I don’t want any. I’m not thirsty.’” The lack of amiability among strangers does not have a positive or negative charge; it is not an issue but a way of life that is accepted unanimously, a convention.
Now why might this way of life seem odd to us? Many people might try to argue why being open to talking with strangers for small talk or being open to meeting new people can be a positive or negative thing, and understandably so. Our values can easily be taken for granted, and when this is the case, we fit every unfamiliar thought, behavior, or attitude into a cozy little pocket within our mind’s hierarchical value system, whether we are aware of this need to systematize or not.
Could the outwardly unusual nature of Tashi’s behavior point to the fact that a value judgment has already been made? Believing that he was in too much of a hurry to get home is a projection of our own values onto another culture; that explanation would more than likely suffice for a plethora of similar behaviors in the U.S. If you have spoken with local Nepali people however, you will soon realize that people here are hardly ever in a hurry. Being stressed out and busy is disgusting, revolting (sorry Wall Street, but this is an exaggeration that is mostly true). Lollygagging is rampant.
Sometimes inspiration comes when it’s least expected. Like when a stranger in a bookstore asks you a question and it strikes your core. In fact, that’s the story behind this post.
As an attempt to confront social anxiety and reach out to others, I approached a stranger and asked a blogging related question.
My question: “What do you like to read on blogs? I’m a blogger and I’m considering different topics to write about.”
Reply: “What brings fire to your blood? Write about that.”
That response hit me hard. I began to wonder about not only my answer, but also others’ answers.
And so I contacted some of my fellow bloggers and asked,
Here are their answers. I’ll leave you to ponder the question as you read on.
Dave Ursillo of daveursillo.com
“Living with purpose and passion brings fire to my blood. I harness these strengths through my writing, and more specifically, through writing for others. I strive to share positive messages that blow-minds and inspire people to live happy, grateful and driven lives–and that really makes me feel alive, too.
Contributing to the lives of others’ in these ways makes me feel calmed but highly motivated, peaceful but fired up, strong but humble. In short, living “for others” provides me with a very humble and purposeful sense of Being.”
Ben Lang of epiclaunch.com
“I’m passionate about running an online community. I love hearing people’s feedback and ideas which always brings fire to my blood.”
Alan Perlman of the9to5alternative.com
“Stepping outside of my comfort zone. Whether that’s intellectual, cultural, physical, etc. — anytime I’m exposed to something new, something hard and challenging, something that forces me to grow, to develop, to adapt, that’s what brings fire to my blood. It can be training for a marathon, or traveling to a new country, or something as simple as a new relationship, a new food or an interesting book that tweaks the way I think about a subject. Embracing the uncomfortable, that’s fire.”
Christian Hollingsworth of smartboydesigns.com
“The things that bring fire to my blood are opportunities where I am able to produce, promote and/or design change. In whatever capacity or venture that might be. Some examples in my life have been the participation in music productions, blogging, writing, drawing, public speaking & my own personal growth and development. All these things, and more, are receptacles of change. I believe these thoughts go right along with your original question. Fire. Fire is medium by which change is produced. Tremendous heat from a fire has the power to mold and manipulate even the strongest of materials: metal. By which beautiful pieces of artwork are created, bridges built and homes strengthened. I seek always, to have a degree of “fire” within in my soul for all things I dedicate my time to.”
David of almostbohemian.com
“One day when I’m long and gone, I’d like my legacy to be one that incites excitement in people. That’s pretty much it. I’d like to be the type of envy that inspires others. I’ve already discovered that by living a life that excites me, I always feel good. So what brings fire to my blood? Doing what I love in that moment. It could be surfing, rebuilding old motorcycles, traveling, reading Twain, or learning Italian. However my mood strikes, I run with it. Feed that passion. It’s what makes me come alive.”
JK Allen of hustlersnotebook.com
“Helping others brings fire to my blood. One way I do that is through blogging, which offers me another venue to serve others. Through The Hustler’s Notebook I’m able to share lessons, in hopes to positively impact others. ”
Jacob Sokol of sensophy.com
“Anytime that I step outta my comfort zone and shut that “don’t do it” part of my monkey-mind up, I become fully alive. Whether its starting a conversation with a beautiful women, being radically transparent about my struggles on Sensophy, reaching out to my heroes, or jumping outta an airplane 13,000 feet above ground – I’m all about it.
Our lives expand or shrink in direct proportion to our comfort zones. So if you’re looking for a fail-proof way to be bored and miserable in life – value comfort. However if you’re looking to be fully alive with blood boiling like volcanic lava liquid, BECOME COMFORTABLE BEING UNCOMFORTABLE!”
Oni of youngprepro.com
“The one major thing that brings fire to my blood is results – it doesn’t matter if the result is directly from me or from someone I so much respect I feel more inspired to do more. When I put some efforts into optimizing my blog posts for the search engine and I see a 30% increase in traffic I become motivated to achieve more. When I income increases by 40% in one month I become inspired to achieve more. When I see the earnings/traffic of my favorite blogger double in one month I see the possibilities of me achieving similar results and I do my best to make sure I succeed.”
This is a great question because it can help you prioritize.
Are you pursuing your passions or letting time slip away?
Note: If you’d like to be included in this interview series and did not receive an invite, you can send your reply via the contact form on this blog or email sean{at}vunty.com Please keep your response under 300 words.
Looking for a job? I’ve been there. The first month of last summer, I was unemployed after my high school graduation. I searched job board websites day-in and day-out. Admittedly, I started getting into a bad habit of laziness. I would think to myself, “No luck today, maybe I’ll have better luck tomorrow”. I would wait day after day without finding anything.
I had a very short term mindset at the time. I was solely thinking about finding summer work. I wanted to make money so I could add to my college savings. My attitude became very problematic; since I was only thinking about the short term, I completely ignored any long-term opportunities. I was not willing to make any kind of an effort on a long-term project.
I continued searching the job boards and my productivity hit an all-time low. Finally, towards the end of the summer, I began to realize that if I couldn’t find a job, I could always create one. Since I couldn’t find an opening on the market for the summer, I decided to make myself a job. That’s right, I produced a job out of thin air. I freelanced to clients and ended up earning over $1000 that summer.
Lesson: Don’t just do what’s easy. It’s easy to search the job boards and complain. The truth is, there are plenty of moneymaking opportunities available, as long as your head’s in the right place.
Tip: Think about doing something purposeful.
Once I changed my mindset, I started working on an ebook(to be released soon) and freelanced. Working for myself was actually very rewarding. I was able to decide a lot on my own: my hours, my pay, and my tasks. But most importantly, I allowed myself room to develop in whatever way I saw fit. Instead of following outside guidelines, I followed my own.
My Suggestion: Can’t find a job? Create one.
Words from a friend of mine named Lee!:
People love telling others what they think. Strangers tell me what they think all the time, and sometimes what they think is contingent on me being wrong- which I gladly grant. And whether I care to listen or not doesn’t really matter, insofar as they’re given sufficient air time without interruption we can move on with our lives. This happens on the street, on the bus, on Youtube, and it’s lovely. It really is. I think it’s great that literacy rates have reached unparalleled heights and that we’re witnessing a power-shift in the publishing world from the corporate to the community. But I find that it’s like being stuck in a anti-government rally. The goal is noble and purposeful;more power to the people of course. Yet there exists a clear-and often ignored-divide between those who rally for peace and those who rally because they get to chuck flaming wine bottles in the off chance of government retaliation.
And with loosely woven information being delivered from every direction, both from within and without the computer screen, it becomes nearly impossible to gauge the credibility of any single source. There was a study done that showed that nearly 37% of Americans believed that Jack Bauer, the protagonist of the television series 24, was real. Most people still believe what they see on television, where even the most absurd claims are taken to be somewhat veritable, however subjective they may be. This is great for people like Jim Cramer and corporations that feed off this collective ignorance, but sucks for those who want something more substantial than “Bieber Fever” on their daily news reel. As for me, I just find it increasingly difficult to laugh at things I hear and read about because I just don’t know what the hell is funny anymore.
If you want my opinion, which I’m sure you do, I think we’re now living in a period where anybody-and I really mean anybody- can shout into the Internet and be heard. I’ve had my air time, but I’ve also written things that I now regret because they’re either a distorted reflection of my personality or an utter lie. And what’s worst, there’s so much wordage in the these Internet soap box operas that if everyone cared to listen the advice of William Zinsser, whose opinion really matters, we could probably cut every article ever written(including this one) in half and still get the same message across fine.
Even then, who do I listen to in the midst of everyone tooting their own horns?
Time to Stop Talking and Start Doing
Recently, with the help of many people around me, I honestly admitted to myself that it’s time for me to stop talking and start doing. Let me explain.
Just the other day, my friend Rakeen and I made a trip to the bookstore in order to brainstorm ideas for Vunty and the direction of the blog. As I was suggesting ideas in one of the book aisles, Rakeen slowed me down, and asked, “Wait a minute, are you actually going to do any of the things you’re mentioning?” It was a great question. I then started asking myself, among the numerous ideas I had, which of these would I actually attempt? I began to realize that there were many I probably would not even try. Some of them seemed too fantastical or required a skill I did not possess. But the main obstacle to my development was the discomfort of not knowing where an idea could lead me. I felt too attached to my present state, and I feared for what could happen if I took a leap into the unknown.
Leaving My Comfort Zone
Rakeen then challenged me further saying, “If you really want to change, you have to do something that will make you uncomfortable.” Rakeen is right. The most uncomfortable area is where I have the most room to grow. The validity and value of the point closely resonated with me. I knew it on an intellectual level, but reminders are helpful. I then started to really ask myself, am I making attempts to leave my comfort zone on a consistent basis? Because where I am too afraid to venture is where I have the most room to grow. For example, I have always struggled with being social. Making conversation does not come easy to me. Upon meeting new people I seem to shy away, hiding my personality, afraid of God knows what. I would certainly like to work on developing a level of comfort in social situations, but I can no longer continue just talking about it. Now it is time for me to start “doing”. I will not delay this leap into the uncomfortable, not only for personal reasons but also for the growth of this blog. What would a personal development blog be without my being proactive about my development, despite feeling discomfort? I mean, that is the purpose of a personal development blog, right? To change yourself in a drastic way, actually do something, and then share how you did it with your readers? So at the very least, this is motivated by my blogging pursuits.
But of course, I’m doing this for personal reasons too. Thinking back on my personal journey with social anxiety, it is as if I had been a caterpillar who formed a cocoon. As other caterpillars around me started to come out of their cocoons, I remained complacent and tried to find new ways of improving my habitat from the inside. However, in time, other butterflies noticed I was staying behind and they wanted me to join them outside. Instead of waiting any longer, they decided to help me depart from my cozy environment. As I felt the effects of their actions on my cocoon, it began to hit me; there had been numerous occurrences in which other butterflies had also tried to help me leave my comfortable cocoon. Eventually, in spite of the great strength of my efforts, the numerous bumps catalyzed the natural process that my fear had been delaying. And so, with this post, I encourage myself to stop talking about improving, and start actually doing it. Even if that means I will be forced out of my comfort zone. Because when I choose to leave behind my comfy little cocoon, I will be able to join the other butterflies, floating happily along and confidently communicating my unique nature.
But this post would not be complete without an anecdote about my leap into the unknown. Without an anecdote, this post would just be more talk and no walk. And so, my friend Rakeen and I made a trip back to the bookstore. And again, he challenged me to push myself out of my comfort zone. That day, right then and there. No more excuses or maybe laters. He nudged me along saying, “I want you to go find someone in this store right now and talk to them.” He even gave me a line I could use to start a conversation. As he stood there suggesting what I was to say, my feelings of anxiety began to build in my stomach. I began to run through the future scenario in my mind, already predicting how the conversation would go. The interesting part was that I began making excuses for why I couldn’t go and talk to someone. I reasoned with myself, saying, “they don’t want to talk to you; people at the bookstore don’t want to be bothered, they’re here to find information and you shouldn’t interrupt them.” Looking back on this experience, it now seems as though I was justifying my anxiety. Maybe there was a small bit of truth to the statement that these people didn’t want to be bothered, but if that was the case, they could just tell me.
The feelings of dread in my stomach only got worse and worse (as you may know, social anxiety often arouses physiological reactions). I continued to relent and resist, saying “No. I won’t go talk to strangers, that would be weird.” But with Rakeen’s help and with some thought, I was able to more and more clearly perceive that I was merely labeling the situation as weird, when it really wasn’t. How could an action be weird, in and of itself? It cannot. As with many other things in life, it was my mindset or belief about the action that was determining how I perceived it. Now that I could reason that the action itself wasn’t weird, I felt a little more comfortable with the idea of talking to strangers, but still not completely. Let me assure you, social anxiety is not so simple that it may be conquered on the first attempt.
Baby Steps in the Right Direction
After ten minutes or so of thinking it over in my mind some more, my friend and I made an agreement. He would go with me to approach and talk to a stranger. We picked out someone in the store, and went to ask the man a question. We agreed upon asking a neutral question and something we were authentically interested in knowing. My friend and I approached the gentleman and Rakeen started off by asking, “Of the material you read in the store, how would you feel about reading it on a blog?” He then created some space for me to join in on the conversation and I asked a question. The deed was done. My first baby step (saying a few words to a stranger at a bookstore) was completed. I still didn’t feel so good about the idea of talking to strangers though. After another ten minutes or so, my friend and I then decided that we must try again, and this time I must be the one who starts the conversation. So after much struggling, I agreed. We approached another stranger, person number two, and asked him the same question. Except this time, I was the one who initiated the conversation. Even after this second attempt, I didn’t feel excellent. I felt as though I was still too dependent, and that truly I should be able to speak for myself. And yet, I was too frightened to approach a stranger entirely on my own. Was this a rational thought process? No. But this was honestly how I felt. So we left the bookstore, and as we walked out into the parking lot to leave, I became upset with myself for my inability to approach a stranger.
Accepting my feelings of regret, I came to realize that I should be proud of myself for making the first few steps in the right direction. The negative feelings I had were a benevolent part of the growth process. They were proof that I truly wanted to overcome my anxiety. I decided it was better that I felt upset rather than being merely apathetic towards the process. Then I acknowledged the two steps I had made and felt proud. Proud that I was working toward something, and made some steps in the right direction. Proud that I set my priorities and put first things first. Because I know that if I continue doing this on a consistent basis, I will be able to develop a habit of being more social.
My Personal Myth
I am a nineteen- year-old college student who is going to make it big in this world. Many would rather ridicule me than bear with the alternative: impassive, or at best, half-hearted support. Their cold hardheartedness ironically fuels my desire with warmth that creeps around my mouth until I cannot bear it any longer… My mouth opens. The fire engulfs it all, everything that is within. Can you feel what I am feeling? Every muscle and every bone in my body SCREAMS for life. Have you been lucky enough to know? Ahh! So this is why I live? Hmm…interesting, to say the least. Let us stop and think for a moment.
Debunking the Epic
I stress the importance of living life as an epic based upon awareness of my own values, experiences, and, above all, emotions. According to the World English Dictionary, an epic is defined as “an episode in the lives of men in which heroic deeds are performed or attempted.” The attempt of a deed must come to fruition, with its nature being heroic in some manner or form. How do I manage this when, sometimes, it seems as if the world takes great pleasure in dishing out boredom left and right despite the knowledge that any lack of emotion is my own doing 100%?
If I ever need a reminder, all I have to do is look back at the beginning of this post, and try to empathize with the writer sitting by himself in his room in the heat of summer in front of a machine that complains about the heat using its loudest voice, a computer fan. Somehow, at that moment in time, this person who no longer exists in the same exact way he did then, managed to extract value from some simple feeling, reflecting, and writing, and incorporate it into his life. This value was within him and he had yet to act upon it. But for some reason, it felt as if a vibrant (and, dare I say it, ALIVE) emanation had already begun to influence everything and everyone around him. The key is to not end up satisfied with simply the feeling, because that only constitutes the beginning of the experience. Going back to the words on a screen is selling myself short. Taking that intense energy and channeling (determining the level and form of HEROISM) it into action (the DEED) will create physical value, within both my mind and the minds of others. Then and only then can the reminders become unnecessary. The lifestyle will self-perpetuate.
The Benefit
Okay, so now that I have a better understanding of what the epic life is, why should I strive to live it? If only the reason were to prove them all wrong, all the “disbelievers.” What a thought. Hah! It is easier just to rid myself of friends who disagree and instead surround myself with “yes men.” I would find an abundance of the passive if I were interested in bolstering my reputation. But alas, it is not that easy. Why then would I shoot for this seemingly delusional state of mind? Think of the rigors of the insurmountable climb, the heaviness of the world on one set of shoulders, and the daunting feeling of impossibility and helplessness. There is a violent clash here between triumph and failure, and in that violence I discover feelings that have the power to sway me in ways that other types of pursuits of happiness would not provide by a long shot. And so, I shoot my arrow at victory, but I make sure to tie the end of my arrow to the start of my day so that it never leaves today behind.
1. A Blog is for The Long Term
Vunty has now been live on the Internet for over a year. One of the most important lessons I have learned over the past year is the importance of having a long term view for your blog. Knowing that you may not see results immediately, it will be easier for you to put more work and dedication into it. Be confident that you will see results in the long run, even though your posts may take a lot of time and effort to write. This paradigm shift will greatly affect your blogging attitude and consequently, the way your blog will develop. For example, you may be willing to write more guest posts, knowing that you will have plenty of post ideas for your own blog in the future.
Blogging takes patience and practice. When I first started Vunty, I was very excited and hoped to see results quickly. Now I realize how important it is to remain patient and continue with my own plan of action, regardless of what may appear to be the case over the short term. Be patient with the results you are seeing. Do not expect success overnight. This is perhaps one of the most crucial points that I wish I had fully realized when I began this blog. Blogging takes time and effort. It takes time to gain knowledge of what works and what doesn’t work. It takes time to increase your following. It takes time to become a better blogger. It is true that in one summer, I was able to successfully earn over $1000 by launching my services to clients through this blog. At the same time, blogging takes a continuous and concentrated effort. If you let your blog sit and do not work on it, you will not see the results that you would like. Also, writing each and every post takes more time than you might think. A good post will likely require a few hours of research, brainstorming, writing and editing. In a way, a blog is like a long term investment. Each and every hour that you commit to your blog, the more you can expect to improve; at least that’s how I like to think of it. With this in mind, I am able to remain focused and on track with how I spend my time working on Vunty. Try not to become too focused on short term gains or monetary incentives; blog about what’s important to you and let your passion shine through in each post. As I look back on this blog, I hope to stay true to my values. If I can achieve this while developing and sharing my findings, I am confident it will be worth all the hard work and effort.
Little by little, I improve upon this blog and add posts. Day-by-day improvement is the key to long term success. I must continue reading other blogs, and increasing my knowledge of the blogosphere. Along with this, I must continue working diligently to achieve my goals. At the very least, I will be able to share my progress as I continue learning. I hope my readers will stick with me on my journey, as I help them grow along with me. This is part of the fun of blogging: watching yourself grow into a better writer, thinker, planner, designer, entrepreneur etc. It is part of your development as a person too, which is why blog tips and personal development fit together well as the theme of this blog 
2. The Importance of Planning Your Blog
My next point results from the first. Since your blog is for the long term, you want to plan it out. Before you put your blog out there on the Internet, it is a good idea to have at least twenty-five posts already written. With posts already written, you can plan a post release schedule as you continue working on new ones. That way, you’ll continuously have posts being added to your blog and it will never go stagnant. Make sure you have ideas for twenty-five pillar articles at the minimum.
Also, it would be wise to plan out twenty-five guest posts to send to other reputable blogs in your niche. You’ll be able to start building your name and reputation with this approach. And from the start, you can hope to have a decent amount of traffic for your new blog. Continue sending guest posts to other blogs as your blog develops. Keep in mind, ads are not the best source of income in today’s blogging world. Starting off with Vunty, I knew about different monetization methods, but I hadn’t fully planned out my strategy. Over time, as I read more and more, I realized that relying on ads as a major source of income from this blog was not a good idea. I then realized that it would be much more effective to offer a product or a service. At the same time, I came to realize the services I could offer my readers and also began developing a product. Refer to my post How to Make One Million Dollars From Your Blog for more ideas on how you can monetize your blog.
3. The Importance of Making Connections
When you first start your blog, it is crucial that you seek other bloggers in your niche in order to make connections with them. Comment on their blog, connect on social media platforms, send them guest posts, write about their posts on your blog, email them, etc. The important thing is that you develop lasting relationships with other bloggers in your niche. As time goes on, you can share each other’s posts to your readers. Since those readers are subscribed to a blog in the same area, they will likely be interested in your content! And the same is true vice versa. As you can see, making connections is very important. It will help you to create a buzz, build authority, and gain a lasting following. So I encourage you to reach out and establish your place in your niche. Similarly, I have found that guest posts are one of the most effective ways to get traffic to a new blog. That is why guest posting is second on my blogging priority list (second only to writing posts for Vunty).
If you truly wish to have success with your blog, then take it seriously. Maybe ask yourself: If this blog was a business, what would I do to improve its performance? Am I providing excellent content or service to my customers (audience)? How can I improve this?
Don’t get me wrong. After all is said and done, blogging is a very rewarding activity. It’s great to be able to look back on your progress and watch it grow. As a student, it is fun for me to watch Vunty progress, as I simultaneously develop in my studies. Vunty is almost like an experiment, I can make minor tweaks and changes while observing the effects of those tweaks on its success.
And of course, I’m still learning a lot about blogging. I’m sure there will be more for me to add to this list, and I’ll continue writing posts with tips as I learn more and more.I hope this post encourages you to stick with blogging for the long term and that my insights are helpful.
It’s about time for a new post on this blog, or perhaps a series of posts that will chronicle my spiritual growth over the past few months. Spiritual growth is always an interesting topic. I feel that I have gone through a process of taking in new ideas and sorting them out, almost like sifting sand through a sifter; letting only the big pieces remain. There was one monumental shift that I experienced. It was an epiphany, or perhaps a spiritual realization, that I had been in a place where I was trying to control my destiny in life. I had acted like I was a god, able to determine my own future. A being, capable of anything of which he deemed desirable. I had presupposed all power. I had gone beyond my means. My assumptions? False. My beliefs were sponsored by a fear. A fear that I could not control my own destiny.
So I acted, pretended, tricked myself into believing that I could control my future. It is important to realize the limits of our abilities. This is not to say that we are not always improving and growing. But there are some things that we have no control over in our lives; there are some things we must leave up to Divinity. And this is one of the main realizations I had during my Freshman year at college. Whether we like it or not, we cannot have complete control over everything aspect of our lives. Also during Freshman year, I became more reflective on what is real in this world. We live in a very technologically oriented society. Each and every day, there are new websites built, games made, Facebook profiles updated, tweets, technological products manufactured etc. This is not to say that technology is inherently a bad thing. However, it is important that we caution ourselves against living an illusion. In other words, to caution against becoming so consumed by technology that we lose track of what is revealed to us by nature as the nature of our reality. We are truly forced to live a balance between technology and our reality as humans. Perhaps this is what Heidegger wanted to remind us in “Being and Time”. “Being and Time” is Heidegger’s plea to return to the question of the nature of Being. In a very basic summary, Heidegger cautions philosophers against oversimplifying the definition of Being. One way to think of it, is that to be able to ask a question, shows that Being is. Heidegger explains that Being is not an entity, but allows for entities to exist. Heidegger had an amazement with the nature of reality and did not take reality itself for granted. When we return to this question, we are able to return to the wonder and awe of the nature of reality. We develop an awareness that we are not in control of Being, but comprehend its power in our lives.
I have acquired a simple calming practice that works very well so I’d like to share it.
To begin, close your eyes and be still. Take a few moments to let your thoughts subside and let go of any tension in your body. Start to take a few breaths in through your nose and feel your diaphragm expand with air each time you breath in. It is not necessary to take real deep breaths, just focus on your breathing. Each time you exhale, be aware of your breath as it slowly leaves your body. Imagine any stress leaving you as the air escapes.
It’s as easy as that.
Repeat this process until you feel fully calmed.
Some of my favorite quotes on breathing…
“When the breath wanders the mind also is unsteady. But when the breath is calmed the mind too will be still, and the yogi achieves long life. Therefore, one should learn to control the breath.” ~Svatmarama, Hatha Yoga Pradipika
“Focusing on the act of breathing clears the mind of all daily distractions and clears our energy enabling us to better connect with the Spirit within.” ~Author Unknown
“I took a deep breath and listened to the old bray of my heart: I am, I am, I am.” ~Sylvia Plath
